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Mystery Smell
Everything smells like oniony-Spaghetti-Os. Let me re-phrase that. I think everything smells like oniony-Spaghetti-Os, so I spent the week cleaning, and sniffing, asking Andre if he smelled that…and...
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Raticide
I see through your clever disguise. Ever have one of those conversations when you suddenly realize your morality is 90 degrees to the other person in the conversation? Then you have to wonder if:...
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Regicide, Thwarted.
The wasps of the world are out to get me. Whey else build a nest up seventeen stories? The queen is totally playing the long game. On her own she can’t beat me. She’s been thwarted by my screen doors...
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I’m Conflicted
How do you see yourself? My opinions used to be so simple. Men with hot bodies. Yes, please. Washboard stomaches, yum. Then I had to get do some research and ruin it all for myself… I watched a show...
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Seeking, One Immune System
I do not have the flu. Yet. Price is not object. But if you have one to sell it needs to come with a warranty. I need at least six months between break downs. FYI, I’m sick. Again. I’m not sure if I’m...
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Ok…Where’s the Camera?
If you don’t start making sense, bad things will happen. Just to be on the safe side, why don’t you just sit in the corner all day and hum. This is your last warning. This can’t be my real life....
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Damn, Now I Want Chinese
Does it make me a bad person that I nearly stole someone’s Chinese food order? Buzzzzzz Me: Hello Stranger: Is this 2306? Me: <Pausing to think. I’ve been sick…> No. Stranger: I have a...
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Panic
In the last month I’ve had several reasons to panic. Not good reasons, but reasons none the less. My filing system is yet more proof that I’m on the slippery slope to hoarding. This two foot pile of...
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New Additions to My Zombie Resources
Strata might think they’re installing bike storage but they just don’t see the big picture…or the impending Z attack. Thank goodness one of us is planning ahead. Strata is in the process of installing...
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All Hail Iron
Mmmm, Iron. (And tetanus risk, but I may be willing to take the hit at this point.) After what seemed like a million tests, and appointments my doctor informed me that I need iron, lots of iron. Then...
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O.M.G. It’s here!
My first published work as an adult. Squeee! 800 new words on the page and Super in print. It’s a good day.
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My Dyson is Judging Me…I might deserve it.
PS, melted Tupperware smells BAD, but it does peel right off a stove element…kind of. I’m Tupperware obsessed and I’ve been trawling second hand stores to buy pieces that I remember my parents having...
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